Judgment Seat of Christ

2.11.2007

How do I reconcile the emotions that flood me right now with the realities that I am facing? Confronted with a raw illustration of the Judgment Seat this morning was the last thing I thought I’d encounter today but it must be timely. Though it feels like I was just punched in the stomach without warning, there must be a reason for it and I wanna explore the emotions & thoughts this left me dealing with today. How can the most important test, the only test that matters, be so easily overlooked in my life? How can I be so deluded by stuff that I miss the importance of each moment, each breath I’ve been given? How can I get distracted so easily that my focus is not on what IS but on what is fleeting? How can I pass people every day without a second concern as to their spiritual state? How can the moments that comprise my days be filled with selfish ambition that will amount to nothing I have to lay at Your feet? How can the mirror dictate my attitude and my decisions as opposed to the gifts, talents, identity, and LIFE I’ve been given by Your Son? How can this Truth which is eternal and piercing get watered-down by mere man? How can the sin that You were nailed to the Cross for get to a point in our society where it is justified and even glorified? How can the Power in Your name and in Your life be exchanged for false gods that offer no sense of hope, purpose, or fulfillment that is lasting? How can I hold tightly to unforgiveness and bitterness and resentment that You already said is YOURS to judge? How can I allow myself to be deceived into thinking that I have any control when One day I will understand fully that everything is of You and through You and by You and for You?

The list of questions could go on but the question I guess that sums them all up this morning is what am I going to do with the reality of the Judgment Seat? In light of one day facing my Savior and getting the chance to hear ‘Well Done my Good and Faithful Servant!’ what is my life going to look like? What needs to change? What are tangible steps I need to take and wait no longer?

Sometimes I just wanna wave bon voyage to America and all the stuff that is so distracting and sail off to some remote village in Africa where life seems simpler and there is less to distract me from my purpose here on earth. But America is where I find myself… surrounded by some of the best-looking, best-dressed, best-educated, most wealthy, most comfortable, most famous people in the world. With access to pretty much anything in this capitalistic country of ours, we grasp for pretty much EVERYTHING and are left with pretty much NOTHING (on the inside). We are shells of people walking around, and not that in other countries this is not the case, but I guess the difference is that we don’t know it. Our shell looks prettier and smells nicer than the shells in Africa… but when opened the inside is just as dead & rotting. As Jesus put it, we are white-washed tombs. We would be better off to just expose the tombs we are… but we are deceived just because our tombs look nice on the outside & just because our pleasure-seeking environment keeps us comfortable and temporarily satiated.

So today as I wrestle through all these questions & observations, a part of me just wants to throw up my hands & find the next one-way ticket to Africa. But that’s not reality and You have me here… in Dallas, Texas. I want to be faithful where I am at and I can already see Your purposes for me here unfolding… with Student Ministries, with Pearl Bridge, with my parents, with everyone I’m living life with here and the community You have blessed me with through Watermark. To up and leave would not only be the easy way out, it would be disobedient to what You have placed before me.

And regardless of where I am, I want to bring glory to Your name so that one day I might hear those sweet words ‘Well done my good and faithful servant!’ I want to live in light of Your Judgment Seat and the coliseum that has a seat reserved with my name carved into it. Because one day I will find myself sitting there awaiting my name to be called. I don’t want that day to be filled with fear and trembling but in excitement to meet You and to lay at Your feet the crowns, the jewels, the treasures I have stored up while here.

Burn away the dross Lord, so that what remains in me is You, so that what I have to give is You, so that what I seek is You, so that what others see is You, so that what I am living for is You. Help me to increasingly make choices that allow Your Refining Fire to have full reign over my heart. And as You have more access to my heart… may Your light grow in brightness through my life.