HIDING

Here's a little something I wrote a couple years ago after I read the book Captivating by John & Stasi Eldridge. God introduced that book to me in a season of dryness... it was a stepping stone He used to free up my heart. It expresses what was revealed to me through that book about the myriad of ways that we, as women, hide. I think we can all identify with one or some combination of ways we hide. Hope it encourages you to step boldly into the light.

Hiding

Worlds apart
From what is true
We hide our hearts
From knowing You

Though One has come to ransom
We feel we must offer more
And our attempts to control
Cheapen what we were created for

Created to offer the world
What is uniquely Eves to give
But something has been stolen
From East of Eden where we live

One offers You her mind
And a life of controlled praise
While denying You access
To the one thing You crave

Lies that define her
As realistic and competent
Push aside her feminine beauty
For things more important

Logic and Intellect
The gods that she serves
Form calluses that harden
Over desires once hers

With Desire disregarded
In the midst of her capable striving
Facades of knowledge form the walls
Behind which her heart is hiding

Another offers You service
Her life void of rest
Never content to just be
Exhausting herself to be best

Past wounds reduce her
Down to usefulness and duty
Breeding invulnerability that masks
Her feminine beauty

Busyness and Works
The gods for which she lives
Defined by all she does
Leaves her with nothing left to give

Her heart is forgotten
In the chaos she creates
But because it feels safe
She prefers to remain

So she hangs a no trespassing sign
Over the longings of her heart
And bids farewell to the desire
Of playing the Cinderella part

And yet another daughter offers
Simply one more pretty face
Trapped in the lie of comparison
All beauty of her Savior erased

Somehow it doesnt seem enough
For a cross to define her worth
So she strives to please the eyes
Of those who see her here on earth

But do they really see her
Or just features that she flaunts?
Still she uses her body to satisfy
The persistent questions that haunt

Physical Beauty and Materialism
The gods of her choice
Attempt to answer her deepest questions
Without giving You a voice

Every new outfit; every pound lost
Seem promising at first
So how did she end up back here
With an unfulfilled thirst?

And still there is one last daughter
Whose heart remains veiled
She assumes the role of nice
Finding comfort in her shell

Mediocrity and Comfort
Are the gods that rule her
And they demand she play it safe
Leaving no room for adventure

Seemingly they protect her from hurt
But meanwhile they rob her of life
Unable to risk, to be bold
She dies a slow death inside


She is convinced that her heart
Is too scary of a place to travel
Shed prefer to remain unnoticed
Forbidding the essence of her to unravel

Lies persuade her experience of You
To reside in shallow depths
Cautious to shield herself from pain
She watches her every step

Never too much
Never passionate
Just Status Quo at best
But always polite
Always civil
Always blending in with the rest

She locks her heart in a dungeon
And throws away the key
But in the still, quiet moments
She hears its faint cries for release

It calls to her in the splendor
Of the nature that surrounds
And in Hollywood-conjured moments
That briefly summon its resounds

But as with the other daughters
The moment passes and her heart is lost
Relinquishing temporary victory
To the enemy Youve already fought

The conclusion of the battle
Has already been told
Still we look straight at Your scars
Forgetting the power they hold

It seems all too often
OUR wounds have the final say
And we opt to remain in patterns
That generations put in place

Lies that our mothers fell victim to
Plague us now as daughters
Ushering us away from the Well
Promising us water

Water that quickly dries
Leaving us parched in this desert to wander
Chasing each mirage on the horizon
With all the hope we can conjure

Because even though we still remember
How to get back to the Well
The path there looks so narrow
Compared to this wide-open trail

Mirage after mirage
Gladly escort us through this dry place
And with the Well no longer in sight
Our hearts bow to altars along the way

Oh how Your heart must break
As your daughters choose other lovers
Jealous for our affections
You watch us slip beneath the covers

In pursuits of our own
We know You by name
But to trust You with our hearts
Seems too risky of a game

Temporary fixes to lifes pain
Turn us desolate or dominating
Un-captivated by You
We become anything but captivating

Our lives merely reflect
The image we perceive in the mirror
But the glass is foggy and shattered
Distorting what we think we can offer

Amidst the pieces of brokenness
And the fogginess that clouds
You declare us beautiful and desirable
Creations lovely crowns

Oh that we might return to you uncovered
Our hearts vulnerable before Your throne
Stripped of all masks all idols all defenses
To reveal a reflection that is Your Own

Each stepping stone of faith
Improving our vision
And soon we look only to notice
A clear view of Your Son

So Lord, direct our aimless wandering
Recover what has been lost to the past
Strengthen our ransomed hearts for the journey
That leads Your daughters Home at last!!!